"Kon'yoku" (mixed-gender bathing). Hearing this term might surprise many foreigners. Men and women bathing together in the same tub is an exceptionally rare practice globally.

When I first learned about mixed-gender onsen, I must admit I was puzzled. However, after studying its history and visiting a secluded mixed-gender onsen, my understanding changed. This is not about sexuality; it is a unique bathing culture nurtured by the Japanese over centuries.

In this article, I will sincerely explain the history, cultural background, and current situation of mixed-gender onsen.

What is Mixed-Gender Bathing: Clearing Misunderstandings

First and foremost, it is crucial to clarify that Japan's mixed-gender bathing culture carries no sexual connotations.

Mixed-gender bathing is purely a cultural practice where men and women bathe together. It reflects how Japanese people have historically understood concepts like "nudity," "bathing," and "shame" in a way entirely different from the West.

Until the Edo period, bathing for Japanese people was an act of purification, and nudity was seen as a natural state. The association of nudity with sexuality was not strong. Mixed-gender onsen and public baths were social spaces where village communities gathered and exchanged information.

Without understanding this cultural background, one cannot discuss mixed-gender bathing.

The Shock of the Meiji Era: The Mixed-Gender Bathing Ban

In 1868, the Meiji government issued a ban on mixed-gender bathing.

Foreigners visiting Japan at the end of the Edo period were shocked by the mixed-gender bathing culture. To their eyes, it appeared "barbaric" and "shameless." Records from that time describe Japanese people as lacking a sense of shame.

The Meiji government, in its rush to be recognized as a "civilized nation" by Western powers, pursued rapid Westernization. Consequently, mixed-gender bathing was banned as a "shameful practice."

However, this was a significant contradiction for the Japanese. A natural practice continued for centuries was suddenly deemed "shameful." While urban public baths were segregated by gender, the mixed-gender culture did not easily disappear in rural hot spring areas.

This event is a symbolic example of cultural relativity. What is "shame" and what is "nudity"? The answers differ entirely by culture. Western values are not always "correct."

The Disappearing Mixed-Gender Onsen: The Current Situation

Today, it is said that there are about 100 facilities offering mixed-gender onsen in Japan. Once numbering in the thousands, mixed-gender onsen are now an endangered species.

Many regions have regulations prohibiting mixed-gender bathing for those over 10 years old. More facilities are allowing women to wear bath towels. Still, more and more facilities are abolishing mixed-gender bathing in favor of gender-segregated options.

Why are mixed-gender onsen disappearing?

There are multiple reasons: changes in modern Japanese values, incidents caused by inappropriate behavior, legal regulations, and the aging of business owners and lack of successors. These factors combined are quietly leading to the disappearance of mixed-gender onsen.

The Last of the Mixed-Gender Culture in Hidden Hot Springs

Nevertheless, traditional mixed-gender onsen still exist in secluded mountain hot springs.

I visited a solitary inn deep in the mountains of Tohoku. There was an open-air bath by the river, surrounded by a primeval beech forest. No artificial sounds could be heard.

At dusk, I entered the open-air bath. The only other guests were a local elderly couple. They quietly soaked in the onsen, gazing at the sunset. For them, this mixed-gender onsen was a "daily routine" they had visited since childhood.

There was not a hint of sexuality. It was simply about soaking in the onsen amidst nature. Watching them, I understood the essence of mixed-gender culture. It is a memory of a time when humans existed as part of nature.

The Last Place for Family Bathing

Mixed-gender onsen hold another significance: they are one of the few places where the entire family can bathe together.

In typical onsen, men and women are separated. Fathers bathe only with sons, mothers only with daughters. The entire family cannot enjoy the same onsen together.

However, in mixed-gender onsen, the whole family can enjoy the onsen together. Young children can bathe with both their father and mother. This experience becomes a precious time that strengthens family bonds.

A friend of mine once took his family to a mixed-gender onsen. The children were overjoyed, exclaiming, "Both Dad and Mom are here!" They continued to talk about the onsen memories for years.

Mixed-gender onsen are also places for creating family memories.

Strict Etiquette of Mixed-Gender Onsen

Do not misunderstand; mixed-gender onsen have very strict etiquette.

Do not stare. Gazing at other bathers is the biggest taboo. Keep your eyes on the natural scenery or the distant sky.

Do not speak unnecessarily. Do not engage in unnecessary conversation with anyone other than acquaintances. Maintain silence.

No cameras or smartphones. Photography is strictly prohibited. Avoid bringing them altogether.

Maintain distance. Keep a respectful distance from other bathers.

Those who do not adhere to these rules have no right to enter mixed-gender onsen. It is unfortunate that inappropriate behavior by some has tarnished the image of the entire mixed-gender culture.

Mixed-Gender Onsen as Cultural Heritage

I am not suggesting that everyone should try mixed-gender onsen. Those who feel uncomfortable should not force themselves. It is a personal choice.

However, I believe it is important to know the history and cultural background of mixed-gender onsen.

Mixed-gender onsen are cultural heritage that show how Japanese people have perceived "nudity," "shame," and "bathing." They convey the diverse cultural practices before Western values dominated the world.

Japan gained much through Westernization during the Meiji era, but it also lost some things. Mixed-gender culture is one of them. Now, it is on the verge of complete extinction.

Respecting cultural diversity means trying to understand values different from one's own. Instead of dismissing mixed-gender culture as "barbaric," understanding the Japanese perspective on nature, the body, and community is true cultural understanding.

Documenting a Vanishing Culture

In 20 or 30 years, mixed-gender onsen will likely be almost gone. Legal regulations, societal values, and the aging of business owners all accelerate the disappearance of mixed-gender culture.

Perhaps it is an inevitable part of the times. However, that is why it is important to record and understand why this culture existed and what it meant.

Mixed-gender onsen demonstrate the diversity and depth of Japanese onsen culture. They are valuable cultural records that tell how humans have interacted with nature, perceived the body, and defined shame.

I am not encouraging visitors to Japan to enter mixed-gender onsen. However, I hope they learn about its existence and history. Let it be a starting point to think about cultural diversity and the relativity of values.

Mixed-gender onsen are the last bastion of a vanishing Japanese bathing culture. They challenge us to consider "what is culture," "what is shame," and "what is nature."